The Stable Genius

(a poem about no one in particular ; o)
Today, dear fellows, I would like to tell
of the many ways I do excel.
Great depths of wisdom do inside me dwell
Even if it’s true I cannot spell.
Bring forth the doubters, I will prove them wrong.
Among celebrities—that’s where I belong
Watch me buy their fealty for a song
Though it’s respect for which I truly long.
To Wharton go and ask of anyone
About the many wonders I have done.
The legislative victories I have won...
Keep your accurs’d subpoena from my son!
My brilliance has been told throughout the land.
With glittering gold, which is my fabled brand,
I’ll smite my bold detractors where they stand
I go now to my minions, strike the band!
What’s that, you say? I lack a balanced view?
There’s no one who can do what I can do!
The counsel that’s been offered, I eschew
It’s through my Twitter feed, I choose to spew.
My button’s bigger than the other guy’s.
Surely that is proof that herein lies
Great strength and bluster which forever tries
To hide the sickness everybody spies.